Mom or Glorified Babysitter?

To define a mother, a person could actually take many meanings from the word. 

  • bring up (a child) with care and affection.
  • look after kindly and protectively, sometimes excessively so.
  • give birth to
  • a woman in relation to her child or children.
  • an extreme example or very large specimen of something
  • an elderly woman.

Mothers are women who inhabit or perform the role of bearing some relation to their children, who may or may not be their biological offspring. Thus, dependent on the context, women can be considered mothers by virtue of having given birth & by raising their child(ren).  


Mother can often apply to a woman other than the biological parent, especially if she fulfills the main social role in raising the child. 

    Biblically:

    The Greek word philoteknos appears in reference to mothers loving their children. This word represents a special kind of “mother love.” The idea that flows out of this word is that of caring for our children, nurturing them, affectionately embracing them, meeting their needs, and tenderly befriending each one as a unique gift from the hand of God. 

    Being a mother is a very important role that the Lord chooses to give to many women. Those whom the Lord blesses to be mothers should take the responsibility seriously. Mothers have a unique and crucial role in the lives of their children. Motherhood is not a chore or unpleasant task. Mothers also play an ongoing role in the lives of their children, whether they are adolescents, teenagers, young adults, or even adults with children of their own. While the role of motherhood must change and develop, the love, care, nurture, and encouragement a mother gives should never cease.

    Several things are commanded of Christian mothers in God’s Word:

    • Availability – morning, noon, and night (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)
    • Involvement – interacting, discussing, thinking, and processing life together (Ephesians 6:4)
    • Teaching – the Scriptures and a biblical worldview (Psalm 78:5-6; Deuteronomy 4:10; Ephesians 6:4)
    • Training – helping a child to develop skills and discover his/her strengths (Proverbs 22:6) and spiritual gifts (Romans 12:3-8 and 1 Corinthians 12)
    • Discipline – teaching the fear of the Lord, drawing the line consistently, lovingly, firmly (Ephesians 6:4; Hebrews 12:5-11; Proverbs 13:24; 19:18; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:15-17)
    • Nurture – providing an environment of constant verbal support, freedom to fail, acceptance, affection, unconditional love (Titus 2:4; 2 Timothy 1:7; Ephesians 4:29-32; 5:1-2; Galatians 5:22; 1 Peter 3:8-9)
    • Modeling with Integrity – living what you say, being a model from which a child can learn by “catching” the essence of godly living (Deuteronomy 4:9, 15, 23; Proverbs 10:9; 11:3; Psalm 37:18, 37).


    By all the above, I am a legit mother of 6! 2 biological girls & 4 bonus boys. I researched the context of the previous from various different sites, finding both worldly & biblical directions of this universal & all covering word. This is for my fellow Step/Bonus/Extra/Other mom’s out there that struggle from time to time. 

    Its stuff that being a Step Parent can be one of the hardest positions in the parenting realm. Blended families have a high divorce rate…as goes without need of explanation. I, personally, have a BLENDED Family.  

    As with any aspect of life, there are good times & bad & with the right perspective, the good far outweighs the bad. But like anyone would know, when the bad is present, the struggle is real. At the end of the day, you are no one as far as some are concerned. The privilege of being spoken to, on those days, are either forced, pried, or nonexistent. But you hide your hurt so no one can see. “No need to take it personal.” 

    *One thing that is a must to remember, is that God entrusted YOU to help raise these kids. YOU were the one chosen to be placed in their lives. Yes, people differ from each other. Not many function identical from the next. We are on different playing fields & that’s expected. All have different backgrounds of childhood that bring them to certain places in their parenting & just life in general. Remember, it’s not you! The fight is not of flesh, but of the spiritual realms. 

     School, responsibility, accountability, manners, truth telling & respect are all important things to me, as when I was growing up, it was instilled as such. So to sit back & be a spectator, isn’t fun or humorous. I like to have some sense of control over things or people that are in my care for even a slight time, that’s my down fall. Not a control freak by any means, but to have to watch some things & not be able to truly act, yet want to intervene but can’t..kills me. Then if my intuition becomes correct over time, it hurts me more because i had no power to try my hand in altering the outcome. I tend to pay attention to my children & their actions even if I’m not in close proximity. My parents & family had a constant watch over us. The world has changed greatly so my trust of it diminished even more. I don’t allow my kids to walk alone to places, or do things they haven’t shown the responsibility to handle. You earn your trust, you pull your weight. Not much was handed to me. I knew and know the value of a penny. I knew the importance of school work & how it came 1st, never allowed to battle with material things, taught church & social edicate. The apparent majority of society has lost standards…what a shame.  But such is life. 

    I have limited parenting abilities with 3/4 of my kids as often the 50/50 custody isn’t realistic due to many factors & there’s several days where that is a huge lump of frustration. I’m asked or I assume I’m asked to play a part in raising these children, but that’s not a for serious request in all truth. So I’m having to remind myself that God & prayer hold more power & control than I ever could fathom. I will continue to raise my girls & parent them, I will strive to be a model parent/mom/spiritual guide for the boys. I will remind myself to be in constant prayer for my entire surroundings & I will trust God. 

    Though I often feel defeated, hopeless, like part of me wants to callous or put up a wall, no matter how much I’m dying inside remembering that God is ALL SUFFICIENT is a MUST. Only God must be sought for empowerment, strength, & intercessory. Give it to Him & attempt not to stress or give into the urge to want to quit. The fruit of loves labor’s & perseverance may not be seen in the near future, but one day it will come. Even if it’s a mere glisten, it will bear itself. God is in control. Not us. & that  must never be forgotten. 

    Lord Help me! I need you!